She might not mind hearing about your supplements once, but if that’s all your conversation consists of, you’re going to have a hard time keeping her interested. She doesn’t care which Creatine you’re using or which flavor of protein powder you like best.

Save that kind of conversation for your fitness forums and discussions with your fellow guy friends who also work out. Try to initiate discussions about what she likes from time to time.

Make sure your wardrobe consists of more than just tank tops. Yes, she knows you’ve been working those shoulders and arms – but she’d like you to dress up a little more once in awhile.

What kind of dates will you take a woman on? Hint: she’s not impressed just because you stop by GNC to pick up some more muscle mass builders. To her, it’s just an inconvenience on an otherwise romantic date.

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Some men believe that in order to look strong, it means they have to pick on other, smaller guys. This is a huge turn off to women. You want to be strong and positive, not a big oaf she has to constantly pull away from a fight when you’re out.

She wants you to be a gentleman. Use those strong arms to open doors and pull her seat out for her. Lend her a hand if she’s stepping out of a car or walking up a platform – this puts your forearms on display for a good cause.

If she has friends or family who need help with “honey do” tasks, like moving furniture, or hanging something on the wall, offer to help out in that area. Even though she’ll genuinely appreciate you helping, she’ll also be checking you out when you’re working hard.

Seeing a man do physical labor is a turn on for many women. They like to watch guys put their strength on display in the right way. It makes her feel protected and safe.

Women may not be verbal about checking you out – like how men whistle and make comments – but don’t think she’s not checking out your butt when you bend over the lift something, or drooling over your six pack abs when you have to take off your shirt because you’re getting too hot and sweaty.

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Looks are important, but may not be as important as you think. Bad boys invariably seem good-looking. And while that’s nice, most women prefer a man with intelligence and a certain amount of sensitivity and attentiveness (don’t confuse attentiveness with possessiveness – they’re two different things, and one is not good).

A great personality is more attractive than great looks. And a good sense of humor is important, too. It’s true that not everyone is going to like your sense of humor or your personality.

That’s fine. Not everyone will like your looks either, no matter who you are. You might be very good looking – good for you! But if that’s all you’re relying on to find a great woman, you’re in trouble.

Before we go any further, we need to stop and talk about looks. This is what’s important:

You should be well-groomed, meaning hair cut and combed in a style that you’re comfortable in.

You need to be clean and smell good – not like a cologne factory – just don’t smell of sweat and grime. Make sure your teeth are brushed, that you have fresh breath, and your hands and nails are clean and trimmed.

You want your clothes are neat and clean. They don’t have to be trendy, expensive clothes – just make sure they’re washed and ironed or at least so they don’t look like you grabbed them out of a pile on the floor.

Don’t get anxious about your looks. You might have a bald spot, or a receding hairline, or your six-pack is in the fridge, but not on your belly. Or you might not fit the GQ mold. You can try to fix those things if you want to, that’s fine.

But regardless, you have to be comfortable with yourself and project that. Women will find that interesting and sexy. Stand up tall and smile. Look like you know what you’re doing and what you want.

You’ll get a more positive response. It is perfectly fine to work on your looks if you’re not happy with them. If you think you need to hit the gym, then go! If you think you need to see the dentist for a whiter smile, then do it! If you think you need a haircut, then get one.

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Let’s talk about the substantial things that women value now. Women value the following (in no particular order):

• Confidence
• A nice smile
• Intelligence – this doesn’t necessarily mean book smarts – you have to show that you have common sense. However, many women appreciate a man who reads.
• Attentiveness
• Respect – for self and others
• A great sense of humor
• Acceptance of her for who she is
• A man who shows responsibility and stability
• A man who shares similar values and interests as she

These are the kinds of qualities that women find of lasting value and find attractive even if the hair has gone gray and the six-pack has disappeared.

You can be as big as a house and no amount of muscle is going to make you attractive to a woman if you lack the one thing that draws her to you – confidence.

There’s a reason why skinny, average guys can get the ladies – and it has nothing to do with money. It has to do with the way he carries himself and how he projects confidence to those around him.

Look at Johnny Depp. He’s not muscular. He’s quirky and if you take a good, hard look at him – there’s nothing exquisite about him. He has good bone structure and pretty eyes, but it’s his swagger that makes women fall all over themselves for him.

There are a million unknown Johnny Depp types out in America – guys who have no massive muscles, but enough confidence to carry them through a night where women flock to them wherever they go.

There are also muscular guys who come off as so insecure that it’s obvious they’re hitting the gym to try to make up for it. A woman doesn’t want you to be lacking in this department.

Yes, she wants you tone and fit. She loves strong arms, a flat stomach, a nice rear and strong legs. But she also wants you to believe that you’re a catch – so she doesn’t have to talk herself into it.

There’s a big difference between confidence and cockiness. Don’t mistake the two. Cocky guys are really unattractive to women because it’s just a man who’s full of himself – and she wants your attention to be on her, not your inflated ego.

How do you get confidence if you lack it?

Well for starters, when you begin working on your physical self, your confidence will grow over time. As you lose flab or gain muscle, you’ll feel better about yourself.

Girls love guys who walk standing tall, not hunched over. The way you carry yourself will tell her a great deal about how confident you are. If you rush around all nervously, making yourself small by pulling inward, she’ll avoid you.

Stand straight up and keep your head held high. Don’t puff out your arms like some muscular guys do to make themselves look bigger. But don’t allow your shoulders to sink in, either.

Take your time walking from one point to another – and smile and be friendly. Don’t frantically look for someone – be the one people are looking at instead. There are all sorts of confidence courses you can take to work on this aspect of your life.

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Muscles and a toned physique are very important, don’t get me wrong. It’s just that they’re not the only thing that matters. You have to pair your excellent body building efforts with other things to make your single status disappear for good.

When It Comes to Muscles, Bigger Isn’t Always Better

Men think bigger is better – women don’t usually feel the same – not when it comes to your muscles, anyway. If you look at the lists of hottest men in Hollywood, you aren’t going to see any beefy men on there who fill out an entire magazine page.

Instead, they’re usually slender guys who have a fit physical structure. For example, you won’t see Hulk Hogan or enormous bodybuilders on the hot lists. What you will see are guys like Brad Pitt, Channing Tatum, etc.

You’ll hear lots of talk about how great Brad Pitt looked in Thelma and Louise – when he was trim, cut and toned looking. But you don’t hear how hot he was in Fight Club, when he had bulked up for the role.

A woman likes several things when it comes to a man’s body. She’d preferably like you to be taller than she is. She wants you to be tan (at least to the point of not stark white). And she wants you to be fit, not flabby.

If you have hair all over your body – especially your back, butt and chest, shave it. It will allow her to get a better look at your muscles, and help her avoid having to feel your hairy backside when she caresses you.

She wants you to be physically fit – toned and chiseled is great – but she isn’t expecting perfection, and she doesn’t want you to overdo it and end up looking like the Hulk after someone makes him angry one too many times.

Don’t spot train so that you have huge, muscular arms and little tiny chicken legs. Give yourself a well-rounded workout routine so that you begin filling out and toning up all over.

That way you’ll be prepared regardless of whether you meet a girl who’s into arms and chests or a girl who likes your butt and legs.

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Let’s take a look at the best way to give compliments without being overbearing and scaring her away.

Assuming that you’re just getting to know the woman you want to compliment, or you’ve just barely met her and you want to strike up a conversation, you need to come up with a compliment that’s sincere.

This requires you to pay attention and notice something unique about her that you appreciate. It might be the color of her eyes, her command of the English language, or her expertise with PowerPoint.

In the very beginning, it’s probably better to compliment a skill rather than a physical attribute, but either can be acceptable if done right. For example, you’ve noticed that she has beautiful green eyes, but you don’t really know her.

You can always be forthright and say, “Excuse me, you have really pretty eyes.” The problem with this approach is that you may get a smile and a “thank you” or you might get a look of disgust because she feels you’re using a cheesy pick-up line.

Compliments about what she’s wearing or her body are best left completely alone in order to avoid sounding like you’re out for one thing. Sometimes any compliments regarding physical beauty are better left until you know her better.

Depending on the situation, if you pay attention you can probably come up with a number of compliments that will make her happy and make her want to have a conversation with you.

In a situation where you have a chance to observe her or even listen to her before you actually start a conversation and try to compliment her, you have a good chance of gathering compliments to use later on.

You can find out more about her – her interests and her personality. This can also help you form good compliments. A compliment doesn’t have to be something like “Hey, I like your eyes,” or “Wow! Beauty and brains – I like that!”

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A subtler type of compliment might be a positive statement about things that you have in common, such as “I really liked hearing your thoughts about the environment. I think it’s important that we search for alternative energy sources, too.” This tells her that you admire her viewpoint and agree with it.

Be careful not to hand out too many compliments in a short period of time. If you do, she will immediately become suspicious of your motives (unless she’s really needy), and she’ll probably back off quickly.

A compliment at the beginning of a conversation is probably enough. If you must throw in another, give it a few minutes or add it to your goodbye. Anything more than that is going to make you sound desperate – and that’s an automatic turn-off.

While every woman wants compliments, and lots of them, it’s important not to slather them on too thick. Giving compliments with sincerity is a good skill to learn, and it can get you a “yes” when you ask a woman out on a date. The keys are to pay attention, be appropriate, and don’t overdo it. She’ll appreciate your efforts and if you work at this skill, it’s sure to pay off.

Jerks may be forceful and arrogant, but one thing they aren’t, is timid. A woman may be more likely to be attracted to a jerk than an insecure guy, but the man she’ll choose over them both is a confident man.

It doesn’t help that the time when you feel the least confident is usually when you’re trying to approach a woman. The good news is that you can still act confident, and the better news is that acting confident helps you gain confidence.

If you find yourself touching your face or covering your mouth when you speak, you are definitely showing nervousness. Slouching and bad posture also show a lack of confidence.

Other signs for nervousness include avoiding eye contact and fidgeting. If you smoke, it’s a good idea to stop smoking. Smoking behavior leaves some of the most obvious clues to nervousness – and also, non-smoking women will have a very hard time getting attracted to you.

Confident men, on the other hand, stand up straight with their shoulders squared, are comfortable with keeping steady eye contact, and tend to lean back and put their feet up when they sit down.

They keep their hands away from their mouths, and when they speak they gesture from themselves to the other person. But even confident men make mistakes. You need to avoid coming across as arrogant or unconsciously treating a woman as if she’s a man.

Steepling your fingers is a common gesture of confidence – but it means that you’ve either proved a point or you’re about to. It isn’t very appropriate when you’re asking a woman out.

Leaning back and putting your feet up may project confidence, but if you go the extra step and rest your ankle on your knee and put your hands behind your head, you start to look aggressive.

Standing with your hands behind your back and your chin thrust out is a classic arrogant posture. It’s a position to take when you’re the boss of whomever you’re speaking to, and it’s also not appropriate on a date.

Here’s an example of how to approach a woman with confidence:

Walk toward her with your back straight and shoulders back. Meet her eyes, smile, and offer to shake her hand as you introduce yourself. If she is seated, sit down as well so that you are at her level. Sit quietly, maintain eye contact, and when you speak, gesture from yourself to her. With practice, not only will you be able to act more confident as you approach women, but you will actually be more confident.

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I just got The “System” in the mail over the weekend. I’ve read a little of it and it all makes perfect sense and I want to say thanks.

Anyway, I’m sure you’ve heard my situation before, so hopefully you have some good advice. Here it is:

My best friend got dumped by his girlfriend a couple of weeks ago and he was (and still is) crushed. I met this girl a year ago (through my buddy), and we hit it off as friends. From the start, I sensed that she had a small thing for me, but I acted like I never noticed it, which, I think, made her feelings for me even stronger. I knew in my gut that things wouldn’t work out between her and my buddy due to the fact that she met him right after her divorce. Having been through a divorce myself, I understood what one goes through and how one thinks, so I could just tell that her Interest Level for him wasn’t where it should be. I was correct.

Well, the other night, she broke down on the phone and told me how she felt about me. She is soooo into me – I would say she has 99% Interest Level. She would do anything I wanted her to do (within reason, of course). She is beautiful, flexible, loyal, giving, and affectionate with me (she was never affectionate with my buddy) and I am attracted to her.

I like this girl and think we could be good together, but on the other hand, I don’t want to do anything against the guy who was the best man at my wedding. Help!

Thanks,

Roy – who honestly doesn’t know what to do

Advice for Single Guys from Success Coach – Doc Love

WOMEN DON’T LIE – MEN DON’T LISTEN

You might like to feel needed, but you don’t need to be necessary for her survival in the everyday world. If she isn’t capable of taking care of herself, you don’t need to rescue her.

Be nice to her, but don’t think you can cure her of an addiction or teach her how to handle her personal life better. That’s what counselors are for. Trying to take on that role in a romantic relationship just won’t work.

The woman you want to date will be healthy physically, mentally, emotionally and financially.
That means that she should be able to take care of herself and she won’t be desperate for a man to come bail her out.

A healthy woman won’t use you for security, because she already has her own. She’ll still want to be with you, but because she likes you, not just what you can do for her. And she won’t drop you because someone “better” comes along – she’ll like you for yourself. She’ll be much less likely to be clingy and jealous as well.

If you’re attracted to a woman who just doesn’t have her life together, you need to date someone else. Later, when she decides on her own to straighten out her life, you might date her.

But until then, don’t even try it. Remember, you want your relationships to be happy. If she can’t be happy because her life is a mess, you can’t make her happy and you can’t be happy with her.

You can’t just come in and fix everything for her – that’s her job as an adult. Taking over that job will make her angry with you, no matter how much better your solutions are. Also, constantly having to rescue a woman gets old really quick, so don’t pick that relationship in the first place and you have a better chance of staying together.

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Hold out for a woman who has her life together. If she is healthy physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially, you’ll be able to tell. She’ll be happy, calm, and self-aware. She won’t have to escape reality with drugs or alcohol, or dull the pain in her life with self-destructive behavior.

She won’t make excuses for dumb decisions and insist that she has no choice but to be a victim. She won’t have drama cluttering up her life – which means that she’ll have room for a healthy, happy relationship with you.

Adult dating is a boon for all those seeking companionship but do not have time, circumstances, or guts to do so in the offline world. Despite your maturity, you may need some adult dating tips so that you follow safe online dating norms. Here are some useful adult dating tips that should help you in getting better and safer online dating results.

When dating online, you need to follow some basic adult dating tips in order to enjoy online dating in a carefree and safe way:

• Personal information: Ensure with the dating websites’ terms and conditions if your personal information’s security is honored or if it is made public and to what degree. Make an informed decision before registering.
• Anonymity: Don’t ever disclose your identity to the other person until the time you are too sure about them. You may be dealing with some unscrupulous person who can land you in trouble.
• Communication: Use only the dating sites’ communication tools so that nobody has access to your personal information. Provide your personal email id only and only when you think that it’s safe to share it with the other person.
• Dating email id: Its safest to maintain a dating email id separately. Share this id with all those whom you are dating online. You can have such ids on any free site such as, Hotmail, Yahoo, and Gmail to name some.
• Signature: Your regular signature and your contact details in the signature must not be used when dating online. Use a brief and separate signature for your dating email accounts. If you will disclose your regular signature to a wrong person then he may use it fraudulently to cheat you.
• Pressure: Just don’t yield to your date’s pressure of getting your personal information. A person insistent on obtaining your personal information may not have a genuine motive and if possible steer clear of such people.

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The above mentioned adult dating tips may help you meet your expectations from online dating. Enter the world of online dating with full confidence but just be cautious because in the cyber city you decide the next move and you are responsible for those decisions.

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